Missing you after six years

Hello Nadi,

It’s mom. Today marks six years since you’ve disappeared. I think of you every day and wish you were home safe with me. I’d tell you how much you are loved and missed. My heart aches to see you and hear your voice once again. How precious you are.

The searches for you continue as our primary search area begins to reveal itself. Dedicated teams are now focused on a smaller, refined target area. Each day brings forth new hope as new leads emerge and more people come forward with information about the horrible situation you were in. I can see more clearly now how the last few months of your life may have unfolded.

Years ago you told me about someone you were afraid of. As I understand I wasn’t the only one you spoke to about this. Since you disappeared I’ve watched as one person you knew was arrested for international drug trafficking, another took advantage of your disappearance and essentially claimed your family and your life, and a number of people took to the media claiming to have known you.

As I piece together information, I can only hope the professionals tasked with investigating and solving your disappearance will take an unbiased look at the evidence when they revisit your case. As I say this we are still waiting for DNA analysis to return from the FBI lab in Quantico, Virginia. Hard to believe it’s been years since this piece of evidence was submitted to them.

Given you were adopted from Russia, some time ago you asked me whether or not you had a biological sibling living in Alabama and at that time my answer was that I didn’t know. I can tell you now after further investigation my understanding is that there is no evidence to support you having any biological siblings in the US.

It is with heart wrenching sadness I need to tell you your little son is lost to us. Although we were awarded unlimited visitation, we have chosen to stay away from him since our kids, our family was threatened. I hope he will come to understand how very much we love him and always want to bring him home. He holds a special place in our hearts (as I know he is in yours) and maybe one day he will seek us out and ask us about you…his mommy. As I understand, very soon he will legally become part of someone else’s family. He will have a new name and we will no longer be his legal family…and you will no longer legally be his mommy. I can’t imagine how you must feel reading this. As you know it’s not an action we’d ever support. I keep thinking what would happen if you walked through the door today and asked for your little one…how devastating that would be for you. It’s hard for me to grasp how a baby can be taken from his very capable family who loves him and essentially given to another but this is what happened in Jefferson County, Alabama.

Nadi, I’m sure you never thought your life would turn out this way. I can’t imagine how you must feel. I long to hold you, hug you and tell you it’s going to be alright. In this time of seemingly hopelessness and helplessness I trust you’ll continue to focus on our love for you…God’s love for you. He doesn’t want you to have an awful life. He wants you to be happy and know you are not forgotten. God is at the helm Nadi, He is the driver, He’s in control and one day if it is His will, the truth about the circumstances surrounding your disappearance will become clear to all. If it is His will, we’ll find you.

I love you so very much Nadia. With each sunrise I wonder where you are. I hope and I pray you come home to us soon. If you are out there and are being held captive, I hope you see this to know we have not given up hope…we have not forgotten you.

All my love,

Mom                                                                                                                                                                                 3 November 2014


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